Ten HOLIDAY EATING TIPS!

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat step #3.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Reread tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.

Remember this motto to live by:
'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, a hand crafted beverage in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO what a ride!'

Fun Names

My sister Haley posted this and it looked hilarious so I had to do it. :-D

1. Your name:

Megan

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 3 letter of real name plus izzle)

Megizzle

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal)

Purple Cat

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (your middle name and the street you live
on)

Brianni Woodchurch

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters of your last name, first 2
letters of your first)

Creme (what the heck!!)

6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME:( your second fav color and fav drink)

Pink Dr Pepper

7. YOUR IRAQI NAME: (2nd letter of your first name,3rd letter of your
last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms
maiden name, 3rd letter of your dads middle name, first letter of your
sibilings name(s), and last letter of your moms
middle name)

Eebrwhsmljjerjn (props to anyone who can pronounce that)

8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (parents middle
names)

Kristen Howard

9. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one of your
pets)

Black Angel

Obama

I know this post will likely not reflect the opinions of many of my conservative friends but I just finally feel like I HAVE GOT to say some things. This election is completely unprecedented in so many ways and there are such heated opinions that people have resorted to all sorts of "name calling". Obama is probably the most discussed person in this election so let's discuss him for a minute.

There have been all KINDS of emails floating around out there with many interesting and somewhat ridiculous sounding claims about Obama. Some have to do with his acquaintances and some have to do with the man himself. People, before you blindly forward an email around can you do one quick thing for me? Go to Snopes and do a quick search to verify the email's validity. Many times all it takes is thirty seconds to discover a silly forward is completely untrue and saves everyone a lot of headaches. This applies for all forwards, not JUST forwards to do with the election. This has always been an extreme pet peeve of mine that people believe everything that passes through their inbox simply because it starts with something official sounding like "so-and-so at such-and-such company" or "I heard from my sister's husband this was true".

Okay so there are even more emails running around out there about Obama than I have personally seen so just know if you go here then you will find a list of them. Some of the most popular I've seen and heard of are that Obama is not eligible for the presidency because he is not a natural born citizen or that he wouldn't be able to be his own bodyguard because of his relationship with William Ayers. The first one is ridiculous because I don't know how people think he possibly got this far in politics if he truly wasn't a citizen. I know all you conspiracy theorists out there will give me all these reasons why but I'm not buying it.

There has also been discussion of whether or not Obama is muslim but I think that doesn't really jive with the fact that he's been sitting under that crazy pastor for however many years and then that Obama could be the antichrist. This is also more malarkey because as many of you know there are a lot of prophecies about the antichrist and Obama doesn't fulfill them. The email is rather hilarious because first it claims Obama is muslim (okay whatever) and then says that the antichrist will be a muslim (false)--so now we have lied to say he is one thing so that we can claim he is another thing when really that other thing doesn't need the first? That makes no sense whatsoever but it's late and I'm tired.

People also like to talk about how the world as we know it will come to an end if Obama is elected. I simply don't buy it. Do I agree with his policies? No. Do I want to vote for him? NO. Have I heard some of the crazy things he's said? Yes. But I also happen to know that this country has a lot of checks and balances in place to prevent one branch of the government from taking over and doing ridiculous things. I believe this system can and will work even if Obama should be elected. I also don't think he will do some of the absolutely insane things people keep claiming he will. A lot of those people are Christians and may I just say to you how big is your God? Sure maybe God has decided to withdraw His hand of protection because of the sins of our nation but even when the Israelites were enslaved in Egypt and wandered in the wilderness for forty years because of their own stupidity and sin God was there with them the whole way. So just don't get your panties in such a wad. There is no need to borrow trouble.

"Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof."

I'm not sure why Obama has drawn so much more freaking out than any other presidential candidate in recent memory. Maybe it's because he's a likeable person whereas Gore & Kerry--well need I say more? Part of the frenzy may be that the Republicans just can't seem to get excited about McCain (I'm totally with you there!) and so they compensate by making Obama out to seem like the devil (or antichrist) to give everyone a good reason to vote for McCain. I personally don't think that it's necessary to get into all these side issue/personal attacks when policy can speak clearly enough for itself. If you need a reason to decide who to vote for just sit down with the Republican and Democratic platforms and decide which one you align with most. Then take the policies on McCain and Obama's sites and compare those. Which sound closer to you? Let's leave off all the negative criticism. As we've seen with Sarah Palin it is just a do-unto-others boomerang that will come back to haunt us. So yes, I say vote McCain/Palin but not because Obama is the antichrist. :-)

Lessons Learned During and After the Storm

Someone wrote this forward I don't know who but it just about sums everything up!!!! :)


> Lessons Learned During and After the Storm
>
>
>>
>>
>> Subject: Lessons Learned During and After the Storm
>>
>>
>>> No matter how many times you flick the switch, lights don't work
>>> without electricity.
>>>
>>> Vienna sausages only appear on the food pyramid during hurricane
>>> season.
>>>
>>> Gas mileage is recalculated based on miles per fume.
>>>
>>> Lovebugs do not disappear in 80mph wind gusts.
>>>
>>> Disasters can cancel Texans football game.
>>>
>>> Despite protests, kids can re-live their parents' youth when there
>>> were only
>>> 3 tv channels!
>>>
>>> Cats are even more irritating without power.
>>>
>>> Houston without traffic lights resembles Mexico City , Rome , Los
>>> Angeles and New York City all rolled into a single snarl.
>>>
>>> There are/were a lot of really big trees around here!
>>>
>>> Just because you're 18 doesn't mean you can stay out as late as you
>>> want.
>>> Mayor White meant busine ss when he said curfew.
>>>
>>> People will get into a line that has already formed without having
>>> any idea what the line is for.
>>>
>>> Calories consumed during a hurricane or power outage do not count.
>>>
>>> Telemarketers function no matter what the weather is doing.
>>> New Delhi does
>>> not check the weather report in Houston .
>>>
>>> Most popular text message after September 11: do u hve pwr
>>>
>>> Twenty-seven of your neighbors are fed from a different transformer
>>> than you, and they are quick to point that out!
>>>
>>> Crickets and cicadas can increase their volume to overcome the sound
>>> of 14 generators.
>>>
>>> Dirty clothes in an unsupervised hamper multiply at an exponential
>>> rate.
>>>
>>> Coffee, spaghetti and frozen pizzas can be made on a grill.
>>>
>>>
>>> He who has the biggest generator wins.
>>>
>>> Tree service companies are under-appreciated, except after
>>> hurricanes.
>>>
>>> Water will fill the I-10 & SW Freeway.
>>>
>>> There are a lot more stars in the sky than most people thought.
>>>
>>> If you owned a store that sold only ice, chain saws, gas and
>>> generators, you would be rich
>>>
>>> With only a small amount of guilt Houstionians can collectively pray
>>> a second hurricane to landfall in another state or country.
>>>
>>> And so to our friends and families, some who are still without power
>>> and&n bsp; others who have endured great personal loss, you are in
>>> our prayers. Hang in there, we are making progress. Thank you to all
>>> our first responders, healthcare professionals, service technicians,
>>> teachers, police officers, small business owners, and more who join
>>> with the thousands of individuals sharing their time and talent to
>>> help restore our community to wholeness.
>>>
>>> The most important lesson of all learned from Ike in the last week
>>> is that the human spirit has an amazing resilience that even a
>>> hurricane cannot bend. Through God's love and amazing grace we can
>>> endure all things.
>>

Most accurate forecast model for Hurricane Ike

As Ike approaches check this out. It's pretty cool. :-)